tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5247848622796667300.post7261435663396030466..comments2024-02-28T05:20:45.927-05:00Comments on A Little Pink in a World of Camo: Grievances of DatingMrs Phttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10120454749826802963noreply@blogger.comBlogger84125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5247848622796667300.post-5819608045523778302012-07-08T23:42:59.364-04:002012-07-08T23:42:59.364-04:00Interesting perspective to hear what our children ...Interesting perspective to hear what our children may be feeling as well. Thank you Courtney. There are so many contradictions in the judgments so it's important we tune into our hearts and remain true to who we are and what we really want in life.Jodie Rodenbaughhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05479223728551548171noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5247848622796667300.post-69574512862116365342012-06-25T21:01:31.505-04:002012-06-25T21:01:31.505-04:00Hi Rachel,
As always, I love your posts. :)
Just ...Hi Rachel,<br />As always, I love your posts. :)<br />Just a quick little note here. I met my husband on Match.com. He, too, did not have the box for widow checked and later told me that he almost didn't respond to my "wink" (yes, I made the first move, lol) because he had concerns with dating a widow. After much prodding he admitted that he was concerned that he would never be able to compare with my deceased husband...that he couldn't hold a candle to the man that passed away leaving me with 4 children. I'm happy to report that we have now been happily married for five years and all his concerns went down the drain. :)<br />Have fun dating!!!<br />Lynn<br />www.bradybunchplus1.blogspot.comAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5247848622796667300.post-50114700583532236162012-06-13T08:00:49.928-04:002012-06-13T08:00:49.928-04:00Rotfl! I just stumbled upon you and u are my kind ...Rotfl! I just stumbled upon you and u are my kind of gal- straight shooting- tell it from the heart and you are absolutely right, only you know what's best for you in your journey and where you are today. Honor yourself and those who love and appreciate what you have to offer. You have every right to live a full and happy life. A man who will love you forever will take you and your baggage and help you carefully and lovingly unpack. He's out there- just check all the gates!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5247848622796667300.post-53784914870487097432012-06-02T22:28:51.289-04:002012-06-02T22:28:51.289-04:00Maybe try not to look at it as "baggage"...Maybe try not to look at it as "baggage". I'm technically not widowed, but my fiance died months before our wedding, i was 23 at the time. I think being in our 20's makes it extremely difficult. I am not saying it is not hard for older widows, AT ALL. I'm just saying that the men our age probably haven't dealt with death and may not even realize that someone their age could be widowed, which is why they don't mark that box. Before my fiance died, i seriously would think "old" when i thought about "widow". I'm sure there are insensitive assholes out there :) but maybe some just associate widow as being older and someone they wouldn't be interested in because they have no clue.Nicolenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5247848622796667300.post-58042531509879942222012-05-20T19:46:56.802-04:002012-05-20T19:46:56.802-04:00I absolutely wish you the best of luck in life and...I absolutely wish you the best of luck in life and in love!<br /><br />I am not widowed, but as someone who is going through a divorce, I can understand something. And that is that no matter how many people we know who have gone trough it before us, there is something very lonely and isolating about the experience, because no two experiences are the same. I am glad that you are able to see that! You ABSOLUTELY deserve to be happy! And you have to do what YOU feel is right for you. So when someone judges you, remember that it is only their opinion, and it isn't important. <br /><br />And I'm sorry that there seems to be an exclusion of widows in the dating world. I honestly had no idea. It seems such an odd criteria for someone to think of in the kind of mate they are looking for. But I know that when you do find someone worthy of your time, it will be someone who knows you are worthy of theirs, widow or not.Holding Onhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08014462575234295089noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5247848622796667300.post-36715992007968118972012-05-17T11:08:12.953-04:002012-05-17T11:08:12.953-04:00Someone who understands that your a widow, is the ...Someone who understands that your a widow, is the right person for you... if a man cannot handle that, well then they are just not worth it, and they do not deserve you. Stay strong.Lannhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10489785446351769483noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5247848622796667300.post-131329021024242162012-05-15T12:45:48.104-04:002012-05-15T12:45:48.104-04:00You deserve all the happiness in the world. I real...You deserve all the happiness in the world. I really hope that you find someone who you can grow old with. If I was in your position I would be the same way-meaning, I'd still love my husband, but I know he wouldn't want me to be alone and that he'd want me to be happy. <br /><br />If people give you shit for your decisions then they don't deserve your friendship. You are a strong woman and truly a great catch!Angeliquehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02233349935696588431noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5247848622796667300.post-19713133237153497262012-05-14T18:59:55.047-04:002012-05-14T18:59:55.047-04:00And.... where did you go?And.... where did you go?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5247848622796667300.post-55804566172123235032012-05-12T01:01:50.169-04:002012-05-12T01:01:50.169-04:00Remember the wise words of Dr. Seuss "Be who ...Remember the wise words of Dr. Seuss "Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."<br /><br />You're not the first person I've met who has issues with "Widowed" not being a choice, but when reading about Match my first thought was, Widows are old, that's why they're not marking the box. Now, you're not old, it's just when I think of Widows I think of my grandmothers and their friends. Obviously, one can be widowed at any age (unfortunately) but young Widows are just too close to home. The way life is supposed play out is we out live our children. We get old and wrinkly with the loves of our lives, we spoil our grandchildren, and become OLD Widows. You have a lot to offer, and you're fun. Experience as much life, joy, and love you can squeeze in. Rock Widowhood and show those Match boys what they're missing out on!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01576984124919347135noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5247848622796667300.post-85407728363214257862012-05-10T19:29:04.145-04:002012-05-10T19:29:04.145-04:00First of all, I have to say I have been reading yo...First of all, I have to say I have been reading your blog on and off for 2 years, and always find your posts to leave an impression with me. I think it is brave and courageous to want to date again, and seek your own happiness. To open yourself up like that takes guts. Kudos to you!<br /><br />Second, I wondered while reading this particular post if the people who are matched with you based on your information don't check "widowed" because there is the stigma of age with widowed, and not because they aren't open to the idea of dating a widow in their age bracket.rmangrumhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13195036579910658530noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5247848622796667300.post-81515037964158922682012-05-09T14:16:48.960-04:002012-05-09T14:16:48.960-04:00This post needs a "like" button. It'...This post needs a "like" button. It's so frustrating to be dismissed because the path our lives took us on-that we most certainly didn't ask for-and the assumptions that come with it, though it seems no one ever thinks to ask us how we really feel.Heatherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15133504320361109502noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5247848622796667300.post-53548843303524302492012-05-09T14:16:36.724-04:002012-05-09T14:16:36.724-04:00This post needs a "like" button. It'...This post needs a "like" button. It's so frustrating to be dismissed because the path our lives took us on-that we most certainly didn't ask for-and the assumptions that come with it, though it seems no one ever thinks to ask us how we really feel.Heatherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15133504320361109502noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5247848622796667300.post-15151280251127155672012-05-07T23:23:49.189-04:002012-05-07T23:23:49.189-04:00My parents are divorced and both have partners tha...My parents are divorced and both have partners that they have been with for years. My sister and I were talking one day about someone our age (twenties) who was dating someone with a baby - I have to admit that we may have judged them at first but then my sister said something so simple and sweet that it changed my whole perspective. She said, if Hank (our stepdad) had decided he didn't want to date anyone with kids, he wouldn't be in our life. He wouldn't be around to laugh with my mom and make her happy. He wouldn't be around to take care of us. It's amazing how much of a blessing he is in our lives and I truly appreciate that he didn't NOT date my mom just because she had three kids. I know it's not the same as being widowed but your post really hit home for me. As you said, you deserve to be happy - everyone deserves to be happy - and to not give someone a shot just because they are widowed is so sad. You might be the best person for them and they might not have the pleasure of meeting you. I hope you find your happiness. : )ashleynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5247848622796667300.post-58294835681167394852012-05-07T11:51:20.155-04:002012-05-07T11:51:20.155-04:00Hi girl. My mother was widowed when she was young ...Hi girl. My mother was widowed when she was young like you. You have to get out there a date. You're life can't stop and your friends need to accept that. I am sure you will find someone great eventually and he will respect what you and your husband had.katmcdhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14962987225562317508noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5247848622796667300.post-26643679387544512122012-04-30T13:22:31.772-04:002012-04-30T13:22:31.772-04:00It's my hope for you that you find that specia...It's my hope for you that you find that special someone that fills as much of the void in your life as possible. I know there will never be a complete filling of that void, but when you are ready (and you will know), you will know the one that will be not only right for you, but for your little girl and will also allow you to continue honoring your husband and even expect you to and will help you honor him. Keep the faith that this will happen and know that a complete stranger prays for you, your daughter, and your heart.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5247848622796667300.post-59999108212591538322012-04-22T08:06:03.443-04:002012-04-22T08:06:03.443-04:00Somehow I missed this a few weeks ago. Hang in th...Somehow I missed this a few weeks ago. Hang in there. Hope you are getting out and meeting people and having fun. You deserve that.Jamiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11708857742804062091noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5247848622796667300.post-21782054102956478232012-04-20T20:03:51.351-04:002012-04-20T20:03:51.351-04:00Enjoy dating! And tell everyone who tells you dif...Enjoy dating! And tell everyone who tells you differently to suck it! I have a childhood friend who lost her husband as well overseas, and it has been heartaching for me to watch her recoup and attempt to heal. I am going to share your blog with her because you shine with hope! Bless you and good luck on your next journey!Abigailhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06519998672104805585noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5247848622796667300.post-26714122216856649802012-04-20T14:12:17.541-04:002012-04-20T14:12:17.541-04:00I just stumbled across your blog and normally I wo...I just stumbled across your blog and normally I wouldn't comment but I sit here in tears for you. Your story is powerful. I won't forget it. My husband is in the military serving in the M.E. right now and my heart just exploded reading your posts. I don't know you anymore than what I have read in the last 20 minutes, but I know you are strong. I just wanted to share that.Molly BWhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14253371426805347011noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5247848622796667300.post-40982282617266787932012-04-20T12:26:30.604-04:002012-04-20T12:26:30.604-04:00I had a friend who lost his wife to cancer, they w...I had a friend who lost his wife to cancer, they were in their mid 20's with two daughters. I thought he was so brave! I was a single mom (never married) & seeing a single dad be courageous, really inspired me. When you're a single mom, single dads can be really attractive! Long story short, he found a sweet lady to marry a few years later, & they now have another (3rd) daughter. To this day, he still commemorates her every birthday & anniversary, even though he is happily married. Its awesome! I have another friend, a girl this time, who had been married only a few months, no children, when she & her husband were in a serious car accident & he passed away. She waited several years to date again & is still dating to this day. Dating is tough, no matter what your baggage, divorced, widowed, teen mom (me), or never married. I think you are brave for dating & deserve a big hug! Getting back in the saddle so to speak takes courage. God will open your eyes to the one He has for you...all the others will be obsolete. Johnny will be with you always but our hearts are big enough to love all kinds of people, even multiple husbands!! Wishing you luck!<br />current wife of a former army seargentAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5247848622796667300.post-48407565983621465032012-04-19T16:11:59.492-04:002012-04-19T16:11:59.492-04:00You and your daughter deserve to be happy! I belie...You and your daughter deserve to be happy! I believe that those who judge others are people who have never been in that situation. You are an amazingly strong and courageous woman and I look up to you. I wish you the best in life and I am very happy to have found your blog!Nikkinoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5247848622796667300.post-24079710574507717352012-04-19T02:06:49.796-04:002012-04-19T02:06:49.796-04:00Hugs. I know how pissed I get when I'm on Matc...Hugs. I know how pissed I get when I'm on Match and guys I think would be great potential dates have "Never Married" in there preferences. You don't know what you could be missing out on and that's what gets me upset. BUT...I can honestly say that had I never been married and divorced, I would probably be inclined to do the same. As much as being with a man who has never been divorced is appealing to me, I almost would rather be with someone who has been so they know some of what I've gone through. Anytime I date someone who is not equally yoked, it is a disaster. I've got baggage...big time baggage, but I'm waiting for the right guy to come along and tell me it truly doesn't matter. That's when I'll know he's a keeper...the same goes for you. Hugs. xoxoAnonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08932620806724915243noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5247848622796667300.post-17353613909413415662012-04-18T20:39:14.486-04:002012-04-18T20:39:14.486-04:00Great post!! What's less baggage: someone wh...Great post!! What's less baggage: someone who had a positive relationship but suffered a tragedy _or_ someone who suffered thru some type of dysfunctional relationship?!? I just retired from the Army, and if anything had happened to me, I'd hope my wife had the same attitude as you. Also, when I was 9, my dad died (cancer). After 3-odd years, she married my second father and they are still together 30+ years later. She still loves my dad just like she loves WA (my 2nd dad). You can say the same for me. If that is baggageWhit Whttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10148756064906514534noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5247848622796667300.post-89681213782708272632012-04-18T20:16:29.316-04:002012-04-18T20:16:29.316-04:00Great post! I just retired from the Army; if anyt...Great post! I just retired from the Army; if anything had happened to me, I would want my wife to have your attitude about this. My father died when I was 9 (cancer). After about three years, my mom married my second father. They have been together for 30+ years now. She still loved my dad, I'd say still does to this day. That does not mean she doesn't love WA (dad #2) also. <br />Semper Fi does not mean Semper Alone!!!Whit Whttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10148756064906514534noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5247848622796667300.post-68885661177687080012012-04-17T16:28:09.339-04:002012-04-17T16:28:09.339-04:00You need to do what's best for you and your pr...You need to do what's best for you and your precious girl, and only YOU can determine that. And for those negative commenters? Don't even give them the satisfaction of deleting them.....let the ugly speak for itself. <br />Be happy.<br />HAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5247848622796667300.post-11583099402832193182012-04-16T15:06:42.036-04:002012-04-16T15:06:42.036-04:00Good luck with dating!
You shouldn't be judge...Good luck with dating!<br /><br />You shouldn't be judged. You deserve to be happy.AiringMyLaundryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11051140760624657630noreply@blogger.com